Decolonizing My Faith pt. 4 Matthew 11:28

"Come to Me, all who are weary and heavily burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and YOU WILL FIRST FIND REST (renewal, blessed quiet) FOR YOUR SOULS. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light."

So I went to a highly evangelical church for the first time in maybe a year. The pastor was young and white, and so was the rest of the congregation. It was a small church that Jackson plays piano for, so we went and stayed for the service. The pastor was discussing the new series he was about to present which was on worship. I remember him talking about the different types of worship and what they have meant historically. But, not historically in the context of the Bible, just historically in accordance to the white evangelical American church. He mentioned, hands raising, kneeling, singing but only in the context of today and what it means to christians today. I felt this was a missed opportunity for him to explain in depth of the importance of worship. How people did it during Jesus time or how other cultures express worship, but this was mainly about what it means today to white christians. He also put in big bold lettering on the screen "New Testament worship is NEWER and BETTER than Old Testament worship." I wonder how people who don't experience God through this specific type of worship would feel to a statement like that. Or how the historians or theologians would feel knowing that their history and origin story is no longer acceptable. Perhaps this pastor was trying to say that through the Old Testament worship we have the New Testament worship which is more accessible to the laity.

Anyway, I digress. Matthew 11:28 was put on the screen following a many other random verses or 'sources' to 'prove a point' and this one specifically stood out to me. Being the theologian I am, I decided to pull up the different translations to see how they would interpret this passage. I looked at the NIV, the NLT and finally the AMP. What I Liked about the Amplified translation, is that it provides commentary to help better understand the context of the passage. This is the way the AMP translated this passage: "Come to Me, all who are weary and heavily burdened [by religious rituals that provide no peace], and I will give you rest [refreshing your souls with salvation]. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me [following Me as My disciples], for I am gentle and humble in heart, and YOU WILL FIND FIRST (renewal, blessed quiet) FOR YOUR SOULS. For My yoke is easy [to bear] and My burden is light."

This was quite interesting to me as someone critiquing the services series; worship.

It's been so long trying to understand why I no longer relate to the worship songs, or why the sermons make me angry. And obviously this is no mystery to God. I think the reasons for this weariness is the burden of religious rituals. The context of white American worship no longer suits me. In the midst of systemic racism, violence, and colonization, white American worship, or what this pastor is preaching on, is harmful and no longer refreshing to my soul. Sometimes it takes too much energy to even think about my faith. Sometimes I can't even consider myself a Christian anymore. The burden is heavy and ugly and this is not the yoke so talked about here in Matthew 11.

Doing these blog posts knowing only one or two people will be reading it is an easy burden to carry if it means I get to better understand the yoke Jesus is talking about here. It is promised to be an easy yoke to bear and a light burden to carry. And I can tell you this, the worship that I have found outside the White American church is light and beautiful to take part in. Travel, discussion, protest, community and meals have brought me closer to the Savior than any Hillsong worship band ever has. I know why you raise hands, I know why you kneel, I know why you change the key and why theres western harmonies. I know it, and it's riddled with heavy colonization, hate, and white supremacy, things that are too heavy for my soul to worship with.

So, God, even though you are all knowing and have walked on this path with me for three years, every time I feel a gust of wind, or the sun on my face or every time I wake up and it's snowing I know that its going to be a beautiful day to worship, an easy yoke to bear and a light burden to carry.